je suis venu te dire que..

January 28, 2005 friday - 16:03

if i want to destroy myself who will stop me? who dares try?

watch me fall.

one by one each tender sin wraps itself around me and i feel no longer passion, or righteousness, or indignance. nothingness rushes upwards and over me and there is only pain, and guilt, and ache, and all these are sweet and beautiful
and what i want.

who i am. this is who i am.

this is what is right, what is morally and legally and ethically and spiritually and everythingally wrong, but it is right for me, and who can say it is not because it is me my life and over my life i am sovereign. only not.

i serve my Lord.

who do i become? who am i now?


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