May 08, 2009 friday - 22:04
right now i'm drunk, so i admit it: i want you. when you sat next to me on the couch, just the two of us, all alone, i could almost see you reaching over to me. closing the door and switching off the lights, so that our faces would be lit only by the reflection from the street lamps 20 floors down. i could almost feel your skin under that shirt with the rolled-up sleeves. i wondered what you would taste on my tongue. almond flour. (like i would taste on you.) the bitter aftertaste of tonic. the dryness from the painfully clear vodka. gelatinous lip balm. want. desire. need.
and your signals were screaming so loudly it was all i could do to hold myself back. not to go that extra one, harmless step that i would usually, because this time it wouldn't be so harmless. they say, you always know when someone is into you. and i know... but do i really???
i am going crazy from holding myself back.