this is turning out all wrong

July 11, 2007 - 23:47

i feel my life fraying, not just at the edges but down to the center too.

i don't know what is going on in class but i don't want to find out.

because i don't want to see you.

i don't want to hurt any more. but i am here, alone, suffering.

i wanted to just enjoy the pleasure of your company, without fear or subtext or underlying tension.
but now, i can't even look at you and smile.
i can't stop remembering all the things i thought i'd forgotten.

i don't want this.. but i can't imagine it any other way. what am i to do now? can you tell me?

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