the fourth monday
June 18, 2007 monday - 21:34
if i don't love you
why do i feel this way?
... but i don't.
i promised not to play games. but this is the result. because people play to win, and if i don't play, i don't win.
and then an offer i cannot take up, because of an obligation that is beginning to chafe.
i wish you'd TALK! i wish i knew what you were thinking. if you don't want it, just tell me.
i wish i could go back. we were happy then, weren't we? i knew we were not for forever, but i thought the moment would be a long one.
i do recognise. that i am beginning to look back, and no longer look ahead. i do understand. i see the signs now that i could not bear to give you.
because the price of perfection is hurting.
and the warmest of embraces in the strongest of arms is - as you say - a facade. a house built on lies, a kingdom constructed on thin ice.
but really, i don't have to say a word.