January 09, 2002 Wednesday - 13:50

i am going SO nuts over school. the system sucks. i'm in school longer than my parents are at work, most days, and when i get home i still have SO much homework.. it's ridiculous. how can this system be right?

i don't know how i am going to survive the year.. there's a long, long, long road ahead of me and i'm so tired already.

my classmates were discussing the most humane way to commit suicide today.. i think that says loads.

the worst thing is that all this is so pointless. all this headache and all this stress.. it's not going to create a better world, or solve third world poverty, that sort of thing.. it's so we get to sit for an EXAM, for goodness' sake. sure, there's all that spiel about the 'desired outcomes of education' and 'developing the individual' etc etc.. please! give me a break.

a seminary, or an establishment, or any thing which professed, in long sentences of refined nonsense, to combine liberal acquirements with elegant morality, upon new principles and new systems--and where young ladies for enormous pay might be screwed out of health and into vanity
-jane austen, 'emma'

yup, that's my school. screwed out of health and into vanity (i.e. an ed)? yup, that's me.

there's got to be a better way. there's got to be.

but right now i just want to sleep, and maybe dream about a perfect world, where even the darkness is beautiful.

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