the name of the show is epiphany
May 11, 2003 sunday - 23:07
i dreamt again that i asked someone to kill me. i was shot and it didn't hurt much, except that later i was walking around and i couldn't breathe properly. wonder if i was actually not breathing properly. (SARS.. hehehe)
and after that, i was getting married. (guess i didn't die after all) and i was wearing an orange and purple thai silk gown.
weird dreams i have. like the one where i was married to some rogue during wwII and i was leaving on a journey around the world.
weird dreams, linked by tinges of desire, shades of pain, the scent of aching.
uploaded another story on fanfiction.net. i actually wrote it a year ago. really coincidental that i'm doing this on mother's day.
can't believe i'm still hanging on to FoR. it has been 4 years since i started watching recca. a lifetime ago. and yet not that long.
in another four years, i will be graduating. where will i be going?
and four years after that, what will i be doing? working into the middle of the night, every night, seven days a week?
and four years after, and four years after, and four years after... and then what?
we are all the same, all reading other people's diaries. reaching into someone else's heart, hoping to find something we like. hoping to find meaning, to find a connection. to know, here is a kindred soul. hoping to find the love we do not know how to express, or the sadness we do not know how to speak of. finding ourselves mirrored in the unfamiliar colours of someone else's diary.
and we write in our own, so that someone else may read and know that here is someone he knows and loves.
well, that's the story of my life. tune in again and maybe in the next installment i will actually say something interesting.