i've been pretty heartless about the whole wtc thing so far. i think i would forgive. but it was not my country that was attacked and it was not my family who died. so i don't think i have a right to say anything. despite how ludicrous the whole thing seems to me.
but today i saw a video of one of the people jumping out of the towers.
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Falling. tumbling. limp like a rag doll. I am falling.
my body, it will fall across a million televisions to a backdrop grey and forbidding my body, it will become a symbol. more in death than I ever was in life.
people will cry for me people will rage for me people will feel for me
but nobody will understand me all I feel is terror all I feel is pain trapped up there no escape no relief do I sit and wait for death to claim me?
people will see me and cry but I don�t want to know don�t tell me why
don�t tell me how you will make those who did this pay or avenge all the lives that were lost this day don�t tell me how I�ve made my country strong.
I don�t want to know all that.
I don�t want for people to see me and cry I don�t want to know don�t tell me why.
all is want is for flowers to grow over my grave. for someone to remember this life I gave and for Mother to know that I love her.
I am spinning beyond control away from the sky but into heaven
No more riding the subway underground I belong now to the sky. no more buying salad cream at the grocery store all that is left is destruction
Strange, I think how the meaning of my life is negated and augmented by this my death. Strange, I think how I now seemed to have existed solely to die.
but it doesn�t matter now.
the wind is strangely silent as I fall through it muffled by the blankness of my brain. can�t think anymore
